


Charlie Has Cancer (Again)

by lunrdarling



Category: IASIP, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: F/M, cancer tw, shit gets real emotional real fast
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-26 19:34:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12065592
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lunrdarling/pseuds/lunrdarling
Summary: Dee is the first one Charlie goes to when he finds out (for the second time) that he might have cancer.





	Charlie Has Cancer (Again)

Charlie walked up to Dee’s door with a knot in his stomach. He held onto a piece of paper that had been crinkled all to hell from how tightly he’d been holding it. There were a bunch of big words written on it that he didn’t know how to read or pronounce. He’d asked the doctor to write them down so that he could just show them to people instead of having to pronounce them on his own. There was no way he’d be able to remember them, and this was the kind of thing he didn’t want to get wrong. 

The knock sounded hollow in his ears when he hit his knuckles against the door. It was only a soft knock, much different than his usual. Ever since he left the doctor’s office, he didn’t feel like himself. His chest hurt and his stomach was twisted. His face felt like it was on fire but it was pale as a ghost. He’d thrown up twice while walking home. Charlie didn’t get scared very often but for the first time in a long time, Charlie was truly scared. 

Dee opened the door and looked at him expectantly. 

“What do you want, Charlie?” She snapped before he had a chance to say anything. 

“Can I come in?” He spoke for the first time since leaving the doctor’s. His voice was shaky and even though he’d said he was going to try and be tough about this whole thing, his vocal chords betrayed him. 

Dee’s face changed from annoyed and irritated to concerned. She nodded her head and stepped aside so he could enter the apartment. For a second, he just stood in the middle of the room, fidgeting with the paper in his hands. He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. 

“What’s wrong?” Dee asked slowly. 

He moved sit on her couch and she followed. 

“Um,” Charlie didn’t look at her. He bit the inside of his cheek and looked at the paper in his hands. The words just looked like a jumble of symbols. He recognized some of the letters, but couldn’t put them together to make any of the words. 

“Charlie… What’s wrong? You’re starting to scare me.”

“I um,” He cleared his throat, “I just went to the doctor’s… I went last week but didn’t tell you guys..” He rubbed the back of his neck, looking anywhere but at Dee, “They um.. They took my blood and ran some tests and called me back in today to talk about it..” He looked down at the paper again, “I have uh.. I have cancer, Dee,” He looked at her when he finally said it. 

She blinked hard at him a few times. 

“What?” She looked at him like she didn’t hear him, like he’d been speaking another language. Did he say the word right? He knew how to say it. He must have said it right. 

“Cancer..” Then he was quick to jump into his next sentence, having thought a little bit about this beforehand, “And I know, I know that I’ve said that before and that it wasn’t.. I didn’t have it. But this time it’s um,” He looked back down at the paper and smoothed it out on his leg. Charlie squinted at the paper, trying to sound it out, “Luh-ow… Leh-oo… Lee-oo…”

“Leukemia, Charlie.. Are you trying to say Leukemia?” Her voice was flat. There was no mockery because he couldn’t read it properly. There was no laughing at him because he didn’t know how to pronounce words. She just said it. Somehow it hurt more hearing Dee say it than when the doctor did. 

“Yeah.. Leukemia,” It still didn’t sound like he was saying it right, and he probably wasn’t. That was something he’d have to figure out later. He saw that her hands were shaking in her lap. When she realized that he noticed, she clasped them together, “Are you okay?”

“Am I okay? Charlie, you just told me you have cancer,” She laughed but it was dry and forced, “You shouldn’t be asking me if I’m okay. I should be asking you if you’re okay,” She laughed again, like she sometimes did when she was uncomfortable. 

Her face was just about as pale as his was now. She blinked hard again and looked up before turning away from him for a second. He thought he heard her sniffle. When she turned back to him, her eyes looked a little red. 

Neither of them said anything. They just looked at each other. He didn’t know what to say. He’d told her the news that he had to share, and had expected more of a reaction for him to go off of than this. He didn’t know what this was. She just shut down, and Charlie didn’t know how to respond to that. 

“Does anyone else know?” She finally asked.

He shook his head, “Just you.” 

She reached out for the paper and he handed it to her. 

Charlie sat and watched as her eyes scanned it over. He had real proof from a doctor. That was scary, and he knew it. Her hands shook even more as she held the paper in her hands and finally she set it down on the coffee table in front of them. She let out a shaky sigh, and Charlie mirrored it. 

“When are you going to tell everyone?” 

“I don’t know,” He bit his lip. Truthfully, Charlie didn’t really want to tell them. He didn’t want them to know, and his list of reasons for that was a mile long. He’d have to tell them eventually, though. There was no getting around it. 

More silence fell between them. 

Then, all of a sudden she was hugging him. She had her arms rested on top of his shoulders as they were secured around his neck. He easily melted into the hug and wrapped his own arms around her waist. He felt the prickling feeling of tears in his eyes. There was no way to keep them from coming. He didn’t want to, even if he could. If there was anyone he could cry around, he knew it was Dee. Without a doubt in the goddamn world, he knew it was Dee. Maybe that was why he’d told her first, but maybe it wasn’t. 

“It’s gonna be okay,” She said after a while of just holding him and letting him cry. Her voice sounded thick, like she might have been crying as well. 

“You don’t know that.”

“Stop it,” Dee pulled back from the hug and put her hands on his upper arms, holding them as she looked him in the eyes, “Yes I do. Everything is going to be okay and you’re going to be fine and you’re going to get better. That paper said there’s a chance you don’t have it, and even if you do, we’ll get through it,” He wasn’t sure if she meant the whole gang, or just the two of them, “You’re a fighter, Charlie. We’re fighters. We fight, and we win.” 

She had definitely been crying. There were wet streams of tears down her face and her eyes were red and a little puffy around the edges. Her voice shook occasionally even though she was clearly trying to keep it from doing so. When she spoke again, her voice was quieter and softer than it had been moments before. 

“I can’t lose you,” Her bottom lip quivered. He could see fresh tears forming in her eyes as he stared into them, “You mean everything to me, and I just can’t fucking lose you.” 

He was crying again, too. 

He moved forward quickly and wrapped his arms tightly around her, pulling her to him again. Charlie buried his face against her neck and let himself swim in the sweet scent of her perfume. His bones ached deep to their core in a way that they never had before. He felt safe in her arms, like nothing could ever harm him. Not the monsters in his dreams, not the guys back at the bar, and certainly not the cancer possibly waiting to strike inside him. As long as she held him in her arms, he was invincible. 

“I love you, Dee,” Charlie broke the silence. He held his breath and waited. 

Then, he felt a warm and gentle kiss on the side of his head. 

“I love you, Charlie” She said softly. 

Suddenly, he felt like maybe things would be okay. Not forever, of course, but at least right now.


End file.
